Life is Beautiful

Okay...so like a lot of other things in my life this blog seems to have taken a backseat for the last couple of months. But rest assured...I'm still alive. Things have been very busy since I last wrote back in early November. I moved into my new office building on November 17th and am now piecing together my own little establishment. Even though I've ran my own business for the last two years, adding the building has created a whole new scheme of complications and headaches. I've lost staff, hired staff, fired staff...it's been interesting. But things move forward and I love my new space. As always, with work I do not play well with others...so being out on my own has been a welcome release. If the finances hold out this will be a wonderful little trip.

My personal life has been insane and great. I am still happy...just as I was in November. As a matter of fact...I'm very very happy. C...okay Collin...and I have been dating for a while now and we're living together. Our life is very complicated, but it's good. I never tire of him. We are together 90% of the time...basically apart only when he has to work. He's wonderful and loving and sexy and just plain fun. We're always laughing.

Oh..and correction from earlier...his eyes are blue, not green.

So Collin and I are still finding that we have a lot in common, even given the age difference and the different environments we had growing up. It's interesting that even though we've had completely different roads in life we've ended up together. He's the bad boy who likes to push the envelope and who knows himself inside and out. He's confident enough in himself to not really care what others think about him. He's realized that as long as he's happy in life that's what matters. And he says he's happy...so life is good. Me...I've always been the good girl. I've always done what everyone else expected of me. I've followed all the rules and done what the perfect child should do. But since the separation I've been inching away from that way of life. I feel like I'm completely freeing myself. I'm getting to know what I really like and dislike. I'm not the good girl all the time anymore, but I'm okay with that. I've probably disappointed a few people in the last six months or so, but I don't care...I'm very happy. I'm learning to be okay with me and I'm learning that it's okay to do what I want and what makes me happy...not what will make me look the best in the eyes of others.
So...in addition to Collin...I've also had other changes to my little household. Seems that when I started dating Collin I gained myself a little mini-family of sorts. Collin's son now stays with us on alternating weekends. He's a great kid and I really enjoy having him around. After spending three years in a loveless marriage trying to start a family that my ex-husband didn't seem to want, it's nice to feel like I have a little sense of home. And while Collin and I have no plans to make ourselves a larger family anytime soon, it's nice to know that I'm finally with someone who has that path in mind. He's a great dad...a very dedicated dad. I love that about him. Watching him be a father just gives me a whole new level of respect for him.

As I said earlier, I'm starting to become a new me. It's really quite fun. I spend a lot more time outside of my house and I feel like I'm actually living. Collin and I go out a few nights a week to hang out with friends or my brothers. I've learned to enjoy going to the bars rather than thinking it's a horrible waste of time. We don't go to get plastered...we go to socialize and it's a ton of fun. Collin has also got me snowmobiling. As a matter of fact, we bought a snowmobile for me for Christmas. We now try to go up to the mountains as much as we can to go sledding. I'm learning, but I'm awkward. Collin is a good teacher though and he makes me feel better about how retarded I am with the sleds. He used to be a racer for Polaris, so I'm sure I make his riding a little slower and more boring than it used to be, but he never complains. We actually just got back from a little vacation in Island Park tearing up the powder. I wimped out after a few hours each day, but Collin never made me feel guilty for bringing us back in. Like I said...we always have fun. He's great.

Anyway...enough of that. It gets you somewhat caught up and lets me feel like I'm not completely irresponsible with my little fledgling blog. Things will get better...I promise. And posts will get shorter...I promise.